Autumn’s Adventures

Se parece a teen
January 2, 2009, 10:18 pm
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There is this 17 year old girl that is the daughter of a friend of Laila’s.  She comes to the house sometimes and we chat about music and other stuff.  She can understand English and speak English pretty well but we talk in Castellano.  I think she is really cool and she doesn’t seem 17 at all.  Today she came over to the house and asked me if I wanted to go to a costume party with her.  I said yes even though I hate costume parties (when it isn’t halloween) and I don’t really enjoy hanging out with a bunch of kids in high school.  I’ve already learned that lesson here with Alej, the first person I met when I got here who was a friend of Amber’s and was 16 years old.  Hanging out with Augustina (this girl) is fine but not a ton of youngins’.  But I thought I’d give it a shot, see if I was wrong and it would actually be fun.
I had devil horns as a costume because that was the only costume I had.  They were my sister’s when she lived here.  Augustina’s costume was an elaborate green ladybug.  Her friends were a bumble bee, a cat, a flapper girl…etc.  They were all decked out.  The party was at a small boliche in Los Perales called Rural.  When we entered I looked around me and only saw young kids.  I already felt old and seeing it in front of my face only made it more apparent.  Everyone that is young here thinks I look young — not older than 19.  The youngest I’ve been told I look so far is 16 years old.  It’s flattering but I don’t like to go to parties where the boys look like they are in junior high.  I’ll appreciate looking much younger when I’m a bit older.  When I’m 30 and I look 20 that will be cool but I don’t want to look 16.
Augustina tried really hard to get me to have fun and I felt bad because I didn’t want to give her the impression that partying with her sucked, but with all of the girls screaming and jumping around I couldn’t make it work.  I’m no longer that loud and obnoxious 17 year old that I once was, downing straight vodka in the car on my way to a school dance.  I no longer scream obscene things out the window at boys that are passing by.  I no longer drive my mom’s car like a maniac to seem cool.  I don’t experiment with fancy makeup or wear my hair in crazy ways.  I don’t have posters of bands on my walls and stolen street signs or street cones in my room.  I don’t save empty bottles of alcohol and adorn my room with them as a symbol of my rebellion against the law.  I’m all grown up now and hanging out with 17 year olds make me realize that.  I’m a fucking adult.
When I turned 18 I was depressed.  I thought it was the end of the world. End of my youth.  The best part of my life was over.  High school was so great.  The same thing happened on my 21st birthday.  I was no longer able to rebel against the law by finding a way into a bar with a fake ID or buying alcohol.  I was beating the system.  But now I am happy to be in my mid 20’s.  I’m comfortable with this adult lifestyle.  All of those experiences were fun in high school and college but I’m glad they are behind me.  I feel much freer now that I have the ability to do things legally and I don’t really care about sticking it “to the man” anymore.
I stayed at the costume party for about 2 hours and then I went to Santino to meet the boys and dance for a while.  I saw Dani and Seba there but I didn’t hang around them for very long.  I’m completely over Dani in terms of having feelings for him but when I’m drunk all I want to do is makeout with someone so of course I had feelings to do that.  I didn’t though.  That is why I left quickly.  And besides, I had a huge group of guys to return to…super duper hot ones.


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